thoughts and stuff

good thing about fall is you don't get sweaty and it's so nice staying under comforters all day and not do anything and eat junk food and get fat... and not take showers everyday and not change from your pajamas 2 days in a row. eew.

hehe. well, it's pretty liberating. not thinking of too much responsibilities. playing monopoly or watching dvds every night. telling stories. seeing nice places. meeting new people. sigh.

been hearing a rumor going around there (in the Phils) about me and certain individuals. HAHAHAHA. funny. but untrue.

anyway, that's it for now. it's pretty cold. i think i'll go back under my sheets.

oh yeah, i'm not much of an internet gal, can anyone tell me where i can download episodes of oth? thanks girlies.

Current Mood: lazy
Current Music: DMB

there's this hiker. he goes to one of the mountain ranges in the US in the middle of summer to hike (yes, that's what he does). like any other human, he needs to take a crap, too. so he does. and of course, he uses tissie paper. now, being a hiker and all, he wants to be ECO-FRIENDLY with his waste so he thinks of ways to dispose of it properly. it boils down to two choices: to bury the tissue, or to burn it. Thinking it's the more ECO-FRIENDLY thing to do, he burns the tissue paper. No one was prepared for what is to happen after that.

He created one of the biggest forest fires in the history of the United States, destroying thousands and thousands of hectares of forest reserves. It took three days before the fire was put out.

saw that in discovery a couple of years back. still makes my blood boil.

Current Mood: can't help it.
Current Music: dave matthews band

Must-Read for the new graduates of Poveda - Sir Joey


Foreword:
I am reopening this live journal account because a certain matter has been haunting me for some time now and I cannot live the rest of my life without making certain that those responsible for this would go on with their lives blissfully unaware of the aftermath of their stupid actions. This account will the permanently be closed fifteen days after this message is posted as I have neither the time nor the intention of keeping this account functioning. Hopefully, those who are supposed to read this entry would have done so. And for those who believe in my cause, I hope you let them know about this. In order to protect the people (and school) involved in this story, I will not be mentioning any names. Those who know of this incident will recognize it for what it is.

To the General Public:
Let me tell you a story.
There is this school, Catholic, private and exclusive in nature. It had a new math teacher, and this math teacher was very excited because she had always wanted to teach in this school and she considered her acceptance a dream come true. She was then assigned to the graduating batch. The seniors initially liked this teacher for she was good in what she did, and most importantly, she was very kind. In fact, she was too kind that she even allowed her students to have their snacks during her class even though it was against the rules. The students later on learned to love their teacher. She in turn, despite their idiosyncrasies (students are teenagers after all), loved them deeply. This scenario went on like this for a while until the students (being young and brash) started complaining about how difficult the subject matter was – which of course should not have been a surprise given that they were SENIORS and their subject matter should really be difficult.
And then, during the last math exam, one student decided to break the rules. In fact, she broke the rules by cheating. She was caught. The math teacher was given the crib notes which she showed to her superior. Then, as the test was still ongoing – the math teacher went back; upstairs and made a fatal mistake: she brought the evidence back with her. Perhaps she was stressed or perhaps she had never encountered a case like this before and she wasn’t really briefed on what to do in moments like this.
As if Fate itself intervened, a few moments later, one student came out and chatted with the teacher. Later, a lot of students came bursting out of their rooms, went to the table where the math teacher was and began complaining how hard the test was. In the organized chaos that ensued, as the teacher tried to address the questions of her students, one other student, saw the crib notes – the evidence of the crime, and took it.
The aftermath? The teacher received a harsh reprimand from her superiors for losing the evidence and placing an end to the possible case that could be filed on the cheater. Bitter words were launched at her and the teacher could only feel bad. She was seen crying a lot during those times. And because she had delicadeza, because she was disrespected, because she knew that she can no longer stay in this institution, she resigned. To rub salt on her wounds, she was even told that she would not have been rehired anyway had she not resigned.
And the students? The cheater eventually got off with a slap on her wrist and graduated while her protector (who also graduated) remains unknown until this day although there are suspicions of who she is.

To My Specific Audience:
You get my drift. I would like to believe that I taught you well and you can infer what I expect of you. I want this message to reach those responsible for this dastardly act. Your math teacher was a very kind person. She sacrificed a lot, she put up with your tantrums and idiosyncrasies because she loved you. She was so kind that she didn’t even put up a fight. So kind that her act of defiance, of vengeance, was best expressed by her non-attendance during your graduation rites (and as I would later find out it was not directed against you – but that is another story). Or perhaps you were too ecstatic that day that you failed to notice her absence.
I don’t care how many bridges I will be burning by coming out with this message. You think this is none of my concern? Damn you. But your math teacher would not fight. In fact, she is such a kind person that she isn’t even mad at the two cowards who were responsible for this. Sad perhaps, because they should have known better. But she has forgiven them without even them asking for it. She doesn’t even know about this. I have taken the initiative because I CARE about her, about you and I realized that if your batchmates could do such shameful acts, they could do it to anyone. And that includes you.
I was hoping that my Doppler Effect theory of society would have been instilled in you. For those who are unfamiliar with the term, let me explain. In Science, the Doppler Effect is best explained by a pebble being dropped into a pond creating ripples on the surface. This, in my understanding, is a primary principle used in sound waves. In the societal view the same principles applies, but this time, it means that no matter how little the action may seem, it reverberates outwards, touching other lives in the process and is capable of starting a chain of events. Seems like many people would rather live in the present than think of the future.
And in this case, the Doppler Effect has been proven true even to human actions.
Anyway, we live in a society that exhorts mediocrity. Where being good means you’re a nerd; being upright and honest means you’re “so last decade”; when you say what’s on your mind you’re either arrogant (if you’re male) or a bitch (if you’re female). Every body has this need to conform.
I’ve heard it many times; cheating among students seems so ordinary that they themselves agree that it is inevitable. But what riles me is the fact that they seem to see this as an ordinary thing. As something that should be “cool.” But they never manage to see the consequences of cheating.


To the two who did this:
Your math teacher showed you nothing but compassion. Did you get a failing grade for the year? You did not. And you deserved to fail. She had shown you nothing but kindness and this is how you repay her? All the while you were sucking up to her, spewing flattery and love, you were actually sharpening your knives ready for the kill? You not only stabbed her in the back, you also pushed that knife deeper and twisted it.
I am not the most sensitive person in this world but I am deeply disturbed and affected by this incident. It has shaken my faith in the youth. It has shaken my faith in you. It only means that you have learned nothing from me. I have failed as a teacher.
If this is the future that you represent, if this is what you stand for…then I’d rather live in the past for I am scared of the kind of world you’ll be building.
YOU ARE SHAMELESS!
You are the very parasites, the very people who feed at the very entrails of this society. And I am certain that you are so ecstatic that you got away.
Well, I assure you that this incident will not be swept like dirt under a rug. It will haunt both of you until you go to your graves and even beyond when Lucifer takes you into his loving arms and tears your souls apart. You claim to be Christians and yet you ignore or take for granted the teachings of the faith you follow? And you criticize me for being an agnostic. You are nothing but hypocrites and traitors. You have forever scarred an HONEST woman who was merely trying to make an HONEST living. But perhaps, you don’t know what it means to be honest in the first place, as you had shown me that your vocabulary is severely limited. And your lifestyles have probably warped your values that you no longer know what is right from wrong.
Congratulations! You must be so proud of your pathetic selves.

Afterword:
• For the one who got away with cheating: Damn you.
I hope you’re happy that you have managed to make life difficult for your math teacher. For depriving her of a job. Shame on you for not feeling any remorse, for not admitting your fault. You should be looking for her now, and when you do find her, you should grovel on her feet and beg for forgiveness (something that you don’t deserve) but something she has already given you. I saw you as one of my good students. Turns, out I was wrong. You will never be half the woman your teacher is. And you know what? She still loves you.
• For the one who took the evidence: Damn you.
Your friendship is based on deceit and if you think you were helping your friend – yeah, you were helping her become a worse person than what she already is. In fact, by doing so, you’re worse than she is. You should do the same thing I demanded her to do. And by the way, your math teacher already told me who you are. And I held you in high esteem. Now…take a guess.
• For the non-specific readers, now you know the perils of teaching in this age. Do think twice before you begin a career in teaching. You love your students but some of them end up stabbing you in the back. You get underpaid, you are overworked, and you have students like these and they wonder why fewer and fewer people want to be teachers.
• For my specific audience, after you graduate from college, you should teach at least for one year. Some of you have the nerve to tell us that “you only pay us.” Teach, in high school, perhaps in a school much similar to yours. Hopefully, you will learn to appreciate us better.
• And for all those who think that cheating is cool because everyone’s doing it anyway; that it’s okay that other people’s lives are compromised and shattered just so you can save your sorry asses; you who are not disturbed by this incident; you who decide to ignore this and stay neutral; you who choose the easy road; you who would defend such actions…I have two things to say to you:
One, I am ashamed to have known you.
Two, Damn you too.

Current Mood: sympathetic
Current Music: none

I’ve been in Australia for 36 days now. I haven’t had the chance to really see places since Chippy’s usually at work during the day. I’ve seen some of Melbourne though I have yet to visit the museum where Andy Warhol’s “Time Capsules” is currently on exhibit. I’ve been to Yarawonga, this place with a manmade lake and dead trees in the lake itself. It’s really pretty. I’ve seen kangaroos, too! We saw them in this golf course; we tried following them but we got scared of their kicking power. Hehe. Living koalas I have yet to see. I’ve seen some road kill. According to my friends from here, koalas are really shy and they’re usually high all the time since they eat eucalyptus or something like that which gives them a “highness.” I thought that was really interesting.

I visited a primary school in Glenrowan a week after I got here. It was Multicultural Day, and a lot of people of different races went to the school to be interviewed by the kids. They’re so cute! They asked me to speak some words in Filipino and they asked me how the Philippines was like. I was even shown on the news since a local channel covered it! Haha. That was fun.

Anyway, how’s summer treating you guys? having a blast? Or stuck taking summer classes?

If you guys are having a blast or getting fatter sitting all day or getting bored out of your wits, then congratulations. You have survived a school year, and you have advanced to the next level cleanly. If you are taking summer, then maybe it’s time to reflect on what happened during the school year… at least if you know what was wrong, then you can think of ways to fix it. Nevertheless, hang in there. After summer class, have fun!

It’s getting colder here. I’m really looking forward to the second week of may as some of our (chippy and I) friends are coming over for vacation. Five to ten of them are coming and we’ll prolly go around aussie in a caravan. Know what’s the best part? Chances are the whole trip we’re having is mostly free! When some Filipino guy from Melbourne found out they were coming, he wanted to fix this whole Filipino Community-meets-the-pinoy-actors things, and we might get to go to queensland for free! Isn’t that great? Totally.

Changing topics… I read the journal entry of Sir Joey for the seniors. If you haven’t read it, let me know so I can post it. If you have, here’s what I have to say about it…

I applaud Sir Joey for what he did. Miss Nina didn’t deserve that. She was such a sweetheart.

To the just-graduated seniors involved in that thing: you’re DISGUSTING. I hope you guys FLUNK every math course you’ll be taking from this time on. I hope your kids, and grandkids, and great grandkids all flunk math forever. Or better yet, save your future families the trouble and DROP DEAD. Sorry I’m not as good with writing as Sir Joey is.

To Sir Joey: thumbs up. Hats off. Tama lang talaga ata yung ginawa nating pagsubmit ng LOI nung December. Peyups rule.

Enough of the anger. Haha. It just gets to me, you know? Daming kupal na bata. Oh well…

HEY!!!! Anyone visiting the land down under any time soon? Lemme know if you guys are coming. I’ll go to you and we’ll hang out.

Update me on your lives. Let me know littlest kwentos and chismis. I would love to hear them all.

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: mario

Yes. She is back.

it's been a month since my last entry. After i wrote that a lot of things started happening, and now, i am in Australia.

It's pretty quiet here. We live in a rural city called Wangaratta, a couple of hours away from melbourne. I'm not really doing anything here except read, sleep, cook, eat. i love it. we don't have cable or newspaper subscription. i don't even have an internet connection yet (just using someone else's). But it's all ok. and i'm happy.

how's summer over there? it's getting pretty chilly here as fall is nearing. i've seen some kangaroos, and i tried getting really close but chippy warned me against it. the summer sales are outrageous! roxys, quicksilvers, etc. are around P800 per pair of bikinis. no point of stocking up, though, since it's too cold to swim.

i have a lot of stories to tell, but too little time. next time i'll tell you about the time i went to a primary school.

guys, favor. it's summer na. i don't mind if you read this, but wag nang manggulo, please. everyone just chill.

till next time.

Current Mood: happy
Current Music: none

i've always been scared to leave this country and start a new life in another. i've lived here for 23 years; my family's here, my friends are here... this is my home. But sometimes, you have to take big chances, because they may have big returns. i've been trying to delay my leaving since i was 18. At first my parents wanted to send me to Canada for college, but i refused. then, i was asked if i wanted to take my MA there. I stayed here. They told me to check for employment opportunities, i said i want to serve here. But now, i AM leaving.

Doesn't change that i still want to serve here. I'm leaving for several reasons. One is that i want to be with my boyfriend and start saving money for our future. The second is i want to finish my MA in SPED, and it would be nice to study abroad. Third is working in aussie will allow me to save money so Chippy and i can put up a SPED school here in 2-4 years. So because i love the Philippines so much i am willing to leave and work in a foreign country so i can save enough money to make my dream (setting up SPED schools in provinces) a reality.

I will miss my family. i love my family with all i've got, and just thinking of how much i love them makes it harder to breathe. i will die if anything would happen to them, and i will kill anyone who harms them.

I will miss my dad and our conversations, his jokes, his trivia. i will miss his invitations to have family lunch outs, i will miss his thoughtfulness and sweetness. He gave me a book so i could read something and in the first page he wrote:

"Dear Tabs{my dad calls me this}
Good luck on your endeavors.
Take care kid.
We love you.

-The rest of your family"

i will miss us playing chess, i will miss his little gifts that he leaves on my door. I will miss him calling me "Tabs" (He's the only person i respond to when he calls me that). I will miss him.

I will miss my mom. I will miss our arguments, her mood swings, her strong opinions. I will miss telling her stories about work. I will miss her nagging (YES I WILL), i will miss our bonding sessions. I will miss the occasional yet really comforting hugs. I will miss her unsolicited advice on my driving skills. I will miss us crying together at movies. I will miss her.

I will miss Patrick and Mike. I will miss our bonding sessions, our cd sharing, our kwentuhans about school and life and relationships. I will miss crying to them when i have problems, i will miss our fashion consultations. I will miss our card or chess-playing, i will miss our movie marathon sessions, i will miss us walking in the mall. I will miss them.

I will miss my friends. They love me for who i am and they support me and they kick my ass when i do something wrong. I will miss our joy rides, our tampuhans, our debates. i will miss our inuman sessions, our picnics, our jamming time--

Minsan by eraserheads

minsan sa may kalayaan tayo'y nagkatagpuan
may mga sariling gimik at kaya-kanyang hangad sa buhay
sa ilalim ng iisang bubong
mga sekretong ibinubulong
kahit na anong mangyari
kahit na saan ka man patungo
chorus
ngunit ngayon kay bilis maglaho ng kahapon
sana'y huwag kalimutan ang ating mga pinagsamahan
at kung sakaling gipitin ay laging iisipin
na minsan tayo ay naging
tunay na magkaibigan
minsan ay parang wala nang bukas sa buhay natin
inuman sa magdamag na para bang tayo'y mauubusan
sa ilalim ng bilog na buwan
mga tiyan nati'y walang laman
ngunit kahit na walang pera
ang bawat gabi'y anong saya
repeat chorus
minsan ay hindi ko na alam ang nangyayari
kahit na anong gawin
lahat ng bagay ay merong hangganan
dahil ngayon tayo ay nilimot ng kahapon
di na mapipilitang buhayin ang ating pinagsamahan
ngunit kung sakaling mapadaan baka
ikaw ay aking tawagan
dahil minsan tayo ay naging
tunay na magkaibigan

... guess the good side is, even if i do leave them for a while, i know they will be there for me anytime, anywhere. and i'm very lucky to have them all.

Pops- i love you, you are my mentor. Thank you.

Mommish- you are my guiding light. As much as i deny it, i wouldn't mind being like you when i have my own kids. You are strong. I love you.

Patrick- thanks for being my "kuya" when i really need one. I look up to you. You're a great guy. I love you.

Mike- I love you. i will die protecting you from harm.

my UP barkada- you guys made me live more. thank you for accepting me. thank you for all the love. I love you guys. you all know that. I will kill for you.

my Poveda barkada- you are my oldest friends, and we've made it this far. you all have a special place in my heart. I love you all!

My former teachers and my co-teachers- thank you for the wonderful experience. it was a pleasure knowing all of you. Mrs Par: you are my inspiration. you are the reason i am a teacher.

haaaay. senti! crying, crying. haha.

Current Mood: indescribable
Current Music: none

the PMS is over. the regular bitch is back, and the extra-charged one has left the building.

i'm sorry to the juniors and the freshmen for generalizing your batches. your anger just shows i have more effect on you than you'd like, otherwise you would just ignore it all together. and since a lot of you read this, then lemme just say some things...

i've said these to the sophomores, but maybe i need to say it to a much bigger audience. (warning: this may not apply to everyone) povedan to povedan, just so you know, ang tamad niyo ngayon. you guys are so comfortable being spoonfed. you know who told me that? a manong who's been working in poveda long enough to see the change for himself. he said "turuan mo ng leksyon yang mga yan, tamad na masyado."

and that's what i tried to do. maybe i was wrong in my ways, but i'm learning, too. this is my first year of teaching and i've learned so much from you guys as well.

please don't be lazy because you know you're rich and you can survive for the rest of your lives without lifting a finger. YOU ARE NOT RICH. in fact, you have nothing. everything you have right now is from your parents or grandparents or whoever else. you'll tell me you save for the stuff you buy. but the money comes from...? if you think about it, you have the easiest "job" of all! you study and you get "paid" for it! of course, you'll say it's not easy to study. yeah, i know. i've been there. but just so you know, i would love to be in a university FOREVER and just study while my parents support me. that would be really nice. but i hate that i have to justify everything i buy because it's their money. it's nice when you know that you're buying something because you saved up your pay for it. i know i dont get paid much, but whenever i buy something that's with my own money, that item literally becomes priceless. and it becomes more difficult to part with it because i know i had to work 9-15 hours a day just to get it. you won't understand it now. but try one summer without asking money from your parents and finding other means of footing your luxuries, like having garage sales or tutoring or doing gigs in small bars or whatever. and after you have, try doing it for the rest of your lives.

the only real thing that is yours is your brain. and when you sniff, snort, or do whatever harmful to it, you're wasting the only real thing you have that is yours FOREVER. i know there's nothing i can say that will make you not take drugs if you really want to. my advice on drugs- know your drugs. read about them. know the effects, side effects, etc before you try them out. don't be foolish to get into anything you don't know enough about. that's just plain dumb.

that goes for sex as well. you think that just because nireregla na kayo means you're ready to fuck, and as many as you like for that matter. sex doesn't just involve the physical. there's emotional, social, spiritual aspects, too. know what you're getting into. know how to protect yourselves. as much as it sounds anti-feministic (is there such a word?), truth is, tayo naman talaga ang kawawa. pagnabuntis tayo, tayo lang ang magdadala nun, or tayo lang ang maguiguilty forever na nagpaabort tayo. scientifically speaking, WITHDRAWAL DOESN'T WORK. also, it is so much easier for women to get STDs than to spread them. the exchange of fluids is from male to female. think about it.

on the topic of preggy scares and abortion, although i am a non-practicing catholic, i have stuff to say on those. Don't have sex without thinking a million times that by doing so you might get pregnant. until you have your ovaries removed and until your partner has been castrated, you can always be pregnant. and on abortion, just so you know, out of the millions of sperms that swim to the egg, only about 50 reach the egg, and as you know only one gets in. the chances of someone getting pregnant, with all the physical, immunological, etc factors is about a million to one. why am i saying all this science crap? to show that life IS A MIRACLE. there's no other word for it. if you ain't ready to face the possibility of getting pregnant and possibly an abortion, then either keep your things locked, or protect it...

everyone feels stress. you know we used to have an average of 5 session tests a day and no one complained? of course we'd bitch about it, but our parents went to school ONLY when we were flunking or we did something wrong. otherwise, we wouldn't ask our parents to go to school to try to convince this teacher to overturn a decision. you guys do all these things that make you look independent. you try drugs, you smoke illegally, drink illegally, etc. you do anything or almost everything that makes you feel you are free. yet the second something goes wrong you run back to your parents. now, there's nothing wrong with turning to your parents as i still do that. but when you do something you know you're not supposed to do, face the consequences, no matter how ugly they are. you want to be an adult? that's being an adult.

cut your teachers some slack. they're people, too. it's very hard to teach a class when almost everyone isn't listening. it's even harder when you haven't slept all night trying to think of ways to make the lesson interesting. we don't get paid well. honestly. i make less than what i used to in the call center, and the amount of work needed to be done here is NOTHING compared to answering phones and selling stuff. your teachers are not your employees. or your parents'.

i know it's very "high school" to be superficial. we like a guy based on how he dresses, how rich he is, what car he drives... as you grow older, you'll realize that these things don't matter. in the end, it's all about the heart and the mind. i gave this to the sophomores on the first day of school. lemme put it here so you guys can read it.

The Invitation
By Oriah Mountain Dreamer

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of
meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream,
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have
been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear
of further pain! I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without
moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy,
mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you
to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful,
to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can
bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be
faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day, and
if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on
the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and
bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like
the company you keep in the empty moments.



-maybe i'm wrong, but in the end, aren't these what really matter?

bottomline of this whole thing is, i'm tired of defending myself and the sophs and attacking people or batches. to hell with it. i will help those who need me. i will try to guide those who ask for guidance. say all you wanna say, curse all you want. wish me dead and floating in the sea. as for me, i will continue to write in this lj so that people can read. i am not a guru when it comes to living life, but i try my best. and maybe, when i learn something new, i can pass it on to some of you.

good luck to all of you. be wise.

Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: none

when i wrote my previous entry and addressed the batches, i failed to mention something (someone, actually)good about the juniors...

during the third trimester, i got close to one of the juniors. it was tricky doing that, mainly because people love to talk. but i did it anyway, because i saw something in her that was worth looking into.

no, she never had special treatment. we barely even talked about school (except for the chismis). we got close because she saw past the superficicial bull everyone was so into. she was a filipino at heart, she believed in studying hard, she saw how hard her parents were working so she could have a good life. she had deep thoughts and good principles, and she wasn't swayed by what her peers thought was "cool." she was a real friend, even to those who were backstabbing her. she was REAL.

she got a lot of shit for being close to me. just like the sophomores are getting a lot of crap for it. but here's the question- whoever said that teachers couldn't be friends? that's the problem with a lot of you. yeah, yeah. i was a bitch. i AM a bitch. never denied it, never will. all my friends know that. i don't pretend i'm anybody else. here's my thought though. if you can't see past the strictness and the bitchiness and the draconian measures, then you're not worth knowing. i don't like mababaw people anyway. i dont have patience with stupid people either.

kaye, you know who you are. don't let people tell you otherwise. love your friends even if they judge you. as i've always said, so long as it makes you happy and it doesn't hurt anyone, then go for it. discover who you are. you already have it in you so you don't have to "create" an identity.

oh and on what you told me about being so puny, that's what we all are. but that doesn't mean we should stop trying to change the world. one person at a time, kaye. one person at a time.

Current Mood: calm

wow, never knew my LJ would be a battleground of sorts. batch wars, miss bitanga bashing, etc. it's amusing, but i honestly don't need extra drama in my life.

the reason i made this lj in the first place was so i can keep in touch with my babies (the sophs). that's it. well, i guess it's my fault that i didn't anticipate this. and although this is a public thing, i really don't appreciate you guys going here so you can bash all you want "anonymously." as i've said in my reply to one of the anger-management enrollees (hahaha), i know how to trace IP addresses. and your name might not come up, oh, but your family names or whoever's name that account is registered to, will. next time, just makes sure you use prepaid internet cards. HAHA. remember kids, there's deliberation pa.

now here's my thing. i don't care if you write millions and millions of stuff about me. i've past the stage where i need to be COOL, and i've passed the stage where i will do anything to feel i belong and i am liked. if you don't like me, too bad. i never asked you to anyway. you can hate me for the rest of your lives because i gave you a hard time in your IP or wherever else. I would rather i am remembered that way than not be remembered at all. so say all you want and bash ME all you want. if it makes you feel better, i'm glad to be of service. BUT DON'T FUCKIN TALK ABOUT THE SOPHOMORES AS IF YOU KNOW THEM SO WELL. I LOVE THESE GIRLS, AND IF YOU KEEP ON USING THIS LJ TO BASH THEM, LABASAN NA LANG TAYO NG MGA DAPAT SABIHIN.

YOU CALL THEM SIPSIP BECAUSE THEY'RE CLOSE TO ME? HAHAHA. STUPID FOOLS. IF YOU SAW THEIR GRADES YOU WOULD KNOW THAT THE REASON THEY STICK WITH ME IS NOT BECAUSE THEY WANT TO GET HIGHER GRADES AS THEY KNOW THAT WON'T HAPPEN IN THIS LIFETIME. THEY GET THE SAME LOAD OF CRAP FROM ME AS EVERYONE ELSE DOES.

now i'm not saying they're angels, because they're not. maybe they're just really good at hiding all the not-so-nice things they do. and to me, that's very commendable. (the next things i'm going to say won't apply to all the freshies and juniors and seniors, but if you do get hit, then sorry. if you never did these things ore never got caught doing them, then hats off to you.) but i would rather be with these kids any day than be with blatant shoplifters, or STD carriers, or those who brag about their FBs. Oh and let's not mention those that have sex like crazy without protection and are currently thinking of having their babies aborted (oh i know). i would rather hang out with them and have fun with them rather than be with warry-sniffing alcoholics who lead double lives.

to the freshmen- you're so atat to grow up. enjoy your youth. leave some for college and post-college. don't fuck up your lives just so you can be "cool." or just because you want the thrill. the thrill ain't worth it, and you're not cool if you fuck up your life this early.

to the juniors- don't be too judgemental. don't base everything on superficial things. there's more to a person than the clothes he wears, the car he drives, how much money he has. those things fade, and truth is, everything that you have right now or that your "cool" friends have are there just because you have rich parents that feel guilty about not giving you enough time, attention, and guidance. you have nothing to be proud of financially because those aren't yours. you are dependents of your parents. and until you are working hard for your own money, you have no right to judge those who do. it's very sad that you'll be seniors in a few months, getting ready for a bigger world, and yet your brains are still so puny. i hope that changes soon. you'll have a very difficult time in college if you keep up with that superficial bullshit.

p.s. to the juniors- a lot of you have problems with time management and stress tolerance. and that didn't just come from me.

to the sophomores- i love you guys, and no matter what everyone else says, in my book you're the greatest :) remember the things i've told you. work hard. be fair. respect. trust. love. fight when you HAVE to.

Current Mood: cranky
Current Music: none

a lot are having problems with their IP. 3B i can take. But for the second year people, you have NO excuse. It's really annoying when you have your teacher ninang talk to me so maybe i would change my mind about an IP that was forgotten at home and was not submitted on time. please. kahit si Dr. Macrohon pa magsabi na tanggapin ko yun, hindi ko pa rin gagawin. If you want to have it checked so badly, submit it to her, maybe she will check it.

guys, give me some dignity. don't think i can be swayed by your "connections." deal with the consequences of your action, or in this case, your LACK of action. asar nga ako sa mga abusive sa power eh, tapos gagawin niyo sakin. please. don't test me. this incident will not only ruin your IP grade, it will ruin every grade in your conduct where it can apply. trust me on that.

Current Mood: annoyed
Current Music: tunde